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And I handle it is by telling those people, who think they are doing the community a service by making a negative comment to me publicly, "it was/is non of your business to say to me what you think of my decision. Would you want people going around and "Shaming, or lecturing" you for the choices you've made? No. Would it make you upset if they did? Yes. Would you say they had that right to shame you, or lecture you, about your choice(s)? I would hope you would tell them to mind their own business.
My daughter is loved, by both me and her father. She is happy and healthy. She has a roof over her head, and food on her plate 3 times a day. She has clothes on her back, and toys to keep her occupied. Her father and I live together and she knows we love each other because it shows by how happy we all are. Would any of that change if we were married? No. Does she care if we're married? No. It's your right to have an opinion, just as it was my right to make the decisions I made to have her. It is not your right to lecture me, or shame me, make negative comments about her/my decision to have her, and it is definitely not okay for you to do this to me in front of her, for the decisions I make you don't agree with--you are not the decision maker in what I do.
If you must lecture someone, shame/lecture those that have kids that don't take care of them, that use the public assistance programs for things other than what they're meant to be used for (selling them for drugs, lying to get more out of the system etc.), who abuse the system. Lecture/shame the ones that abuse their kids just because they were annoyed at them, or of the ones that allow their kids to go hungry while they are out doing lord only knows what, or the ones that think it's okay to leave a small child alone while they run an errand. Don't sit on your soapbox and shame me for a personal decision I made because it's not the decision you would have made, or [i]think[/i] is the proper decision to make[i]for[/i] --it's not your right to put me down for my decisions. Don't shame me for not doing what society thinks I should have done because I'm sure you're not perfect nor have made the "perfect" decision(s) sometime in your life. It's my life, and if you don't like it, the nice thing about that is...you can walk away and ignore it---just as I'm about to do to you and your ignorant lecturing." --and yes, I've had the displeasure of this happening to me before .
[i]This is not to be directed to any of you that believe that one should be married before having kids. I'm not bitter about the ones that believe that is the way it should be. Heck, I even wanted it to be that way, but life doesn't always play out the way we always want it to. This is for the ones that think they have a right to lecture me for the decisions I make, more specifically---my decision to have my daughter before getting married. If you think it's wrong that's fine.[/i]
As for the game...I'd rather it not be in the game, and I would choose that even if I hadn't had a child out of wedlock.
